Thanksgiving at the Maxwells
by Dorothy Winner
Summary: It's AC 207 and the Maxwells invite the whole gang over for Thanksgiving dinner... including the kids... chaos ensues...
1. Mission Accepted

Author's Note: I know it's already after Thanksgiving, but oh well. Besides, I think it has been sufficiently enough time after Thanksgiving so that everyone won't cringe at the mention of the word turkey… I know that some other authors may have already used some of the names I've given the children… I'm not copying them or stealing their characters, I just like the name and how it sounds.

Disclaimer: Don't own Gundam Wing. The kiddies are mine, though…

Thanksgiving at the Maxwells

by Dorothy Winner

~*~

Maxwell Residence

Thanksgiving, AC 207

Six-year-old Jason Maxwell tried to twist away from his mother's hands. "No, mommy, I don' wanna wear a tie…"

"Jason, it's Thanksgiving, everybody's coming," said Hilde. "We haven't all been together in years; don't you want to look nice for everyone else?"

"Don' care…"

Duo was standing in front of a mirror, tugging uncomfortably at his tie. "Yeah, Hilde, I don't like these things either…"

Hilde glared at Duo. "You're not helping. He gets it all from you, you know." Jason was exactly like his father, both in looks and personality. She adjusted Jason's tie. "I don't want to see this coming off for the rest of tonight, understand?"

"Yes, mom," Jason said glumly.

"All right, you can go. And you'd better not touch the food!" Hilde called to her son's retreating back.

Four-year-old Helen went into her parents' room, her blue-black hair draping down to her waist unbound. "Mommy, can you braid my hair?"

"Sure, honey." Hilde parted her daughter's hair with a comb and began braiding it into two Dutch braids with practiced ease.

"Hilde, can you braid my hair too?" asked Duo.

"No, Duo, you can braid your hair yourself; it's not like you don't know how. And besides, you've already braided your hair, there's no point in me doing it over again for you…"

"Yeah, but I _like_ it when you braid my hair…"

Just then the doorbell rang. "Oh no, they're here already!" Hilde exclaimed. "Duo, can you get that while I finish Helen's hair?"

"Sure thing, babe." Duo went downstairs to the front door and opened it. "Wu-man! Sally! Great to see ya!"

Wufei and Sally were standing on the doormat, each with a three-year-old girl in their arms. Duo remembered the day they were born with relish. Sally had not wanted to find out the sex of their child until the birth, which meant that she and Wufei argued the whole nine months about whether it was a boy or girl, Wufei, of course, insisting that the baby would be a boy, while Sally remained adamant that they would have a girl. When they found out that they were having twins, the arguments simply became more heated. So when Sally gave birth to fraternal twin girls, Wufei's "NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" could be heard more clearly from the delivery room than any of Sally's cries of pain.

Mia, with honey blonde hair and dark brown eyes, was clinging to Sally, while Wufei was holding the more Oriental twin, Jade, who had long black hair and crystal blue eyes. "Well, do not just stand there, Maxwell, invite us in," snapped Wufei.

"Right, come on in, you guys," said Duo, stepping aside. "Make yourselves comfortable; everyone should be getting here soon."

Wufei and Sally settled themselves on the couch with their daughters when they heard Hilde yell, "Christopher! Come back here!" Everyone looked up to see a three-year-old boy run, stark naked, from the bathroom and down the upstairs hallway, laughing raucously, with Hilde running after him.

"Maxwell, your children are undisciplined. I would not let any of my children behave in such an unruly fashion," Wufei said as Mia climbed around the couch to his back and started tugging on Wufei's ponytail. "_No_, Mia," he said, reaching behind him and prying his daughter's fingers from his hair.

"They're not undisciplined, they're just… active," Duo said, watching as Hilde shouted, "Gotcha!" and hauled the dripping child back into the bathroom.

"Christopher is only a few months older than our girls," remarked Sally.

"Exactly." Wufei looked sternly at Mia and Jade. "When you are older, I do not want either of you getting involved with that Maxwell boy. Is that clear?"

"For God's sakes, Wufei, they're only three years old," said Sally.

"Well, it's best to start them young," declared Wufei.

Sally rolled her eyes. Jade and Mia climbed into Sally's lap and each began tugging on a twist. "No, no, girls, don't do that," said Sally, wincing as she tried to get her daughters to let go. "I don't know what it is with them and pulling on our hair. We're always trying to have to pry their fingers off."

"Oh, don't worry, just give them a few more years and they'll be pulling each other's," said Duo, thinking of how Jason and Helen had recently started pulling each other's braids when they fought.

"Oh _no_," said Sally, "don't say that, _don't_ say that…"

The doorbell rang again. "I'd better go answer that," said Duo, getting up and going to the door. "Hey Heero, Relena, come on in." Jonathan, their five-year-old son, looked very much like Heero, scowling in Sanc Kingdom suspenders and bowtie that Relena had obviously made him wear. Relena was carrying their one-year-old daughter, Serena, who was wearing a cute little pink dress. "Hi, Duo," she said. "Where's Hilde?"

"She's still upstairs, getting the kids dressed, I think," said Duo.

"Not an easy thing to do, I'm sure, since they're _your_ spawn," remarked Heero.

"Hey, they're not just any spawn, they're the spawn of Shinigami," said Duo.

"_Really_, Maxwell, is that the best you can come up with?" scoffed Wufei. "It's through _your_ genes that your children are corrupt…"

"I wouldn't talk, Wufei; isn't it the guy's sperm that determines the sex of the child?" Sally quipped.

"You don't have to rub it in, woman. OW!!!" Wufei yelled as Mia gave his ponytail a rather sharp tug and giggled. 

"Careful, Mia," said Duo, "your dad's ponytail is already tight enough as it is; pull any harder and you might yank some hair out."

"Maxwell! KIS—grrrrr, you are lucky the children are here; other wise you would be in _considerable_ pain…"

"Wouldn't want to set a bad example, now would we?" said Duo, smirking. Sally laughed.

Wufei glared at Sally. "You're enjoying this, aren't you, woman?"

"Immensely," said Sally with a grin.

"Heero, Serena's diaper needs changing, could you do that, please?" Relena asked, holding the baby out to him.

"Now?"

"Yes, _now_," Relena said sternly.

Heero sighed. "Mission accepted," he said sullenly, taking the baby and diaper bag. Heero laid out the baby blanket on the coffee table and lay Serena down on it. He opened the diaper tabs and flinched slightly at the smell.

"Um… ya know, you coulda just gone upstairs to one of the beds," said Duo, wrinkling his nose.

"And run into one of _your_ brats? I don't think so," said Heero, wiping the baby's butt.

"Heero's very quick at changing diapers, anyway," said Relena. She put on a monotone. "'I can change her diaper in under 30 seconds…'"

"The same time it took you to defuse a bomb, I recall," Wufei quipped.

Heero deathglared at Wufei. "Done," he said, handing Serena back to Relena. He held the smelly used diaper out at arm's length. "I'll go dispose of… this," he said, walking out of the living room.

"Oi, put that in the garbage cans outside, okay?" called Duo.

"You know things are sad when the Perfect Soldier's missions are reduced to changing diapers," said Wufei.

~*~


	2. Mission Denied

Disclaimer: Don't own Gundam Wing. The kiddies are mine, though…

Thanksgiving at the Maxwells Part 2

by Dorothy Winner

~*~

Next to arrive were Quatre and Dorothy with their two daughters, Genevieve, five, and Morgiana, four. Duo had pretended to recoil with horror at Genevieve's birth when he peered into the baby nursery and saw her forky eyebrows. It seemed like Genevieve hadn't inherited anything from Quatre at all; she was looking more and more like Dorothy every day, down to the long blonde hair she had grown out almost to her knees. Morgiana, named after the heroine in Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves, took more after Quatre, with wavy blonde hair and Quatre's sweet smile.

"Hey, everyone!" exclaimed Duo. "Quat and Dotty and their kids are here!" 

Duo had started calling Dorothy either Dotty or Catsy, which irked her to no end. Dorothy sighed and shook her head. "Duo, how many times do I have to ask you, _don't_ call me that."

"It's pointless, Dorothy, there's nothing you can do," said Wufei, thinking of the new nickname Duo had coined up for him (Wu-ster).

"Hello, everyone," said Quatre. "Happy Thanksgiving! It's an American holiday, right? Who began it?"

Duo scratched his head. "Well… um, ah… uh…"

"It was a holiday started by the first Pilgrims who came to America, giving thanks for their plentiful harvest," stated Heero.

Everyone turned to stare at Heero.

"I did research," said Heero. "I didn't want to come uninformed to celebrate a holiday without knowing the reason why."

"Oh… I just like Thanksgiving because of all the food," said Duo.

Wufei shook his head. "And I suppose you like Christmas because of all the presents?" he asked sarcastically.

"Well, yeah…"

"Duo, Thanksgiving and Christmas are a time for friends and family," said Relena.

"I—I knew that too," stammered Duo.

"Sure you did, Maxwell…"

Hilde came down the stairs with Helen and Christopher just then, saving Duo from any more grief he might have gotten.  "Hi, you guys, I'm so glad you're here! Sorry I'm late, this little guy's a handful," she said, shifting Christopher in her arms.

"Oh my goodness, he's grown so big!" exclaimed Relena. "Hello, Christopher, do you remember who I am?"

Christopher paused for a moment, his chubby face furrowing in thought. "Auntie Lena… an' Unca Hewo," he said, pointing to Heero. Hilde let him down from her arms so he could walk around. "Auntie Sally, an' Unca… Wufei, an', an', Unca Quatwa, an' Auntie Dory."

"Good job! You're so smart!" said Relena, bending down and hugging him.

"Careful, Relena," said Duo, "that kid has ulterior motives; he'll run you into the ground if he can." The doorbell rang again. "I'll get that," said Duo. He opened the front door. "Hey, it's Mil and Lucy!"

Milliardo and Lucrezia Peacecraft (although everyone was still inclined to call her Noin) stepped inside with their seven-year-old twins, Lucian and Elena, and two-year-old son, Alexander. Lucian was a carbon copy of his father, and Elena looked exactly like Noin except for her long platinum blonde hair. Alexander, who had his mother's black hair and his father's ice blue eyes, had come as a sort of surprise five years after the twins were born, but both Milliardo and Noin were very happy to have another child.

"Hey, Duo, I brought you this," said Milliardo, holding up a bottle.

"Sweet! Wild Turkey!" exclaimed Duo. "That stuff's the best…"

Noin rolled her eyes. "What is it with you and your Wild Turkey?"

"But it's in the spirit of Thanksgiving, Noin," said Milliardo, pointing to the picture on the label, "you know, turkey."

"Somehow, Zechs, I don't think the Pilgrims had drinking bourbon in mind when they had turkey for Thanksgiving…"

Jason Maxwell suddenly appeared, with what suspiciously looked like pumpkin pie crumbs on his chin. He quickly wiped them off with his hand and stared at Elena Peacecraft, adjusting his tie nervously. "Hi, I'm—"

Genevieve and Helen came running, each grabbing one of Elena's wrists. "Elena, c'mon, Helen's got a new dollhouse, you have to see this," said Genevieve, the two girls running upstairs with Elena in tow.

Jason scowled. "Stupid Helen and her _dollhouse_. Who invented little sisters anyway?" He would have been very eager to show Elena any of his toy Gundams. He spotted Jonathan Yuy. "Hey Jonathan, wanna see some of my Gundam models? I have one that looks exactly like your dad's Wing Zero…"

Jonathan was struggling to get his hated bowtie off. He looked up. "Sure," he said, following Jason upstairs to his room.

Meanwhile, Christopher, Morgiana, Mia, and Jade had taken to playing hide and seek. It was Christopher's turn to be it, and he had closed his eyes and was counting. "One, thwee, theven, nine, ten. Ready or not, here I come!"

"No fair, you weren't even counting properly!" exclaimed Morgiana. "You missed two, four, five, six, and eight," she said, counting on her fingers.

"I know _all_ my numbers in Chinese _and_ English," Jade said proudly.

Christopher looked dismayed. "It's hard, I can't remember them all!"

"It's okay, I can help teach you your numbers," said Mia.

"Really?"

"Sure." Mia and Christopher sat down on the carpet. "All our daddy's names are numbers. Uncle Heero, he's one. Your dad, Duo, is two. Uncle Trowa is three, Uncle Quatre is four, and my dad, Wufei, he's five. Try to remember them in that order, and it'll be easier."

"Unca Hewo, one, Daddy Duo, two, Unca Trowa, thwee, Unca Quatwa, four, an' Unca Wufei, five," Christopher recited.

Morgiana and Jade quickly got bored. "We can't play hide and seek with just two people," said Morgiana. "Let's go upstairs, Jade; my sister says Helen's got a new dollhouse."

The two girls reached the top of the stairs and peered into the first room on the left. Jason and Jonathan were sitting on the floor, with a rather large collection of toy Gundams spread out around them.

"Oooooh, are those Gundams?" asked Jade. She plopped down by them on the floor and picked up a Shenlong Gundam. "My daddy's Gundam is the strongest," she declared proudly.

"Nuh uh, Deathscythe's way cooler," said Jason.

"Yeah well, Wing Zero can take on both of your Gundams at the same time and win," said Jonathan.

"Oh _yeah_?" said Jason and Jade.

"_Yeah_," said Jonathan.

The three toy Gundams were soon clashing in the air. It became evident that Jade would be staying, so Morgiana went into the next room. "Hi Morgiana!" said Helen. "Aunt Relena gave me a new game. Wanna play 'Pretty Pretty Princess' with us?"

"Sure," said Morgiana, sitting down next to them. "How do you play? I've never played this game before…"

Downstairs, Wufei wondered at the sudden absence of the children. He looked around and spotted Christopher and Mia sitting together. "Maxwell! What is _your_ son doing with _my_ daughter?"

"What? They're not doing anything," said Duo.

"Awwww, how cute, look, Mia's teaching him how to count," said Sally, watching as Mia held up four fingers. "_Sit down_, Wufei, I don't want you going over there and yelling at them; you'll just frighten them and make them cry."

Wufei's jaw clenched; it seemed that any Maxwell having a relationship with his daughter, even at the innocent age of three, was more than he could stand.

The doorbell rang once more. "Eh heh… I'll go see who that is, okay?" said Duo, avoiding Wufei with a wide berth on his way to the door. "Hey, Trowa, Midii, glad to see ya!" Midii was holding four-year-old Matthew's hand, and Trowa was carrying their eighteen-month old daughter, Isabella, fast asleep on his shoulder. Matthew had the same shock of dark brown hair as his father and had green-gray eyes. Isabella had strawberry blonde hair and her father's emerald green eyes.

"Come on in," said Duo, "we've already started without you!" They went into the living room and found that the women had taken to sitting together and were talking eagerly, while the guys were casting wary, furtive glances in their direction.

"Hey Midii," said Hilde, "we're planning to hit all the stores for all the after-Thanksgiving sales tomorrow. Do you want to come?"

"After-Thanksgiving shopping? Wouldn't miss it!" exclaimed Midii, quickly going over and sitting by them.

It was the one word that could strike fear into the God of Death. "_Shopping_?" Duo said in a high-pitched voice, going pale.

"I don't like this," said Heero, "I _really_ don't like this…"

"Okay!" Hilde stood up, smiling brightly. "So, which one of you would like to go shopping with us tomorrow?"

The look in her eyes made all the other guys cringe. 'Going shopping' with their wives meant following their wives around the mall from store to store, laden with shopping bags, sitting on the mall benches amid all the purchases, enduring stares and snickers from other mall shoppers.

"It's not me!" Quatre cried out, his eyes brimming with tears. "I had to do it last year!"

"W-w-why not Pagan?" suggested Milliardo.

"Pagan is getting on in years," said Relena, "I'm not sure he'd be up to it anymore."

"Hmm," said Sally, "what about you, Wufei?"

"NO!" Wufei shouted vehemently. "Carrying around shopping bags for a… for a _woman_ is dishonorable! It is an injustice to all men who are made to do this!"

"I don't ever want to do it _again_…" moaned Quatre.

"You're being very quiet, Trowa," said Midii. "Why don't you come with us?"

"I'd—I'd just be in the way," said Trowa hastily, "you should just go without me…"

"Well then, since you're all just _so_ eager to go shopping with us," said Hilde, "we're going to have to draw straws."

"_Straws_?!" The men exclaimed in unified horror.

"Yep," said Hilde. "Be right back with them." She went to the kitchen and after a couple of minutes in which the men fidgeted nervously, Hilde returned with a handful of straws. "You don't have to draw, Quatre, you already went last year."

Quatre sank back onto the couch pillows with relief. "Allah be praised…"

"As for the rest of you guys, who wants to go first?" asked Hilde, holding up straws.

Wufei got up in a huff. "I want to get this over with. Give me a straw, woman." He snatched a straw and looked at it. It was long. "Sorry to disappoint you, onna," he said to Sally, and sat back down.

Hilde held out the fistful of straws to Trowa. White and shaking, he held out a trembling hand and drew a straw. He breathed out a sigh of relief when he saw that the straw was a long one. Milliardo came forward and took a straw from Hilde's hand, and was _very_ glad to see he had drawn a long straw as well.

All eyes turned to Heero and Duo. Duo was visibly green now, while Heero, though maintaining a stoic façade, was more scared than he had been in any battle he had fought in the Eve Wars. There was _no way_ the Perfect Soldier would be going shopping…

Hilde held the last two straws out to Duo. Duo squeezed his eyes shut and drew a straw. He opened his eyes.

"NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Heero cried as Hilde revealed the last straw, the short straw, in her hand. "Mission denied! Mission denied!"

The men were looking at Heero with a sort of sympathy in their faces, even Wufei, while the women were looking very pleased. "That's good," said Relena, "the kids can stay with Milliardo while we go shopping."

"Oh joy," said Milliardo. "I get to baby-sit five kids… still, that's better than shopping…"

Heero was ashen-faced. "This… can't… be… happening…"

"It's okay, Heero," said Quatre, patting his arm comfortingly, "you learn to ignore them after a while…"

~*~

Lady Une and Mariemaia were the last to arrive. Mariemaia, now eighteen, had grown into a beautiful young woman. Her red hair had darkened and grown out down to the middle of her back, and there was something of Treize in her poise and grace and the way she would look at you with her clear blue eyes. Lady Une was looking very nice in a long black skirt and a burgundy cashmere turtleneck sweater. "It's so nice to see everyone again," said Lady Une, smiling.

"Yeah, it's just been so hard for all of us to get together nowadays, with our families and jobs, you know?" said Hilde. "So I said to Duo, 'You know what, we should have some kind of reunion, some of us haven't seen each other in over a year,' and Duo says, 'Yeah, how about Thanksgiving?' and so here we are."

"Mother and I were planning to have a girl's night together at home," said Mariemaia, "but this sounded much more fun, so we kind of stole one of the Preventers jets."

"You _stole_ it?"

"Well, the Preventers jets are only supposed to be for official missions," said Lady Une, "so technically, we're not supposed to be using it."

"But Mother's the Preventers' boss, and she made up that rule herself, so she bent it a little just for us."

"Oh," said Hilde, nodding. "Don't worry, I won't say a thing." She turned to Mariemaia. "I was wondering if you could do me a favor. Would you mind sitting at the kids' table? Of course, you're no longer a child, but someone needs to keep an eye on them. Having them all together could be potentially chaotic…"

"I can do it," said Mariemaia. "I don't mind."

"Thank you _so_ much," said Hilde. "You guys can go ahead into the living room with the others; I'm going to be setting the table for dinner."

"Is there anything I can do to help?" asked Lady Une.

"Actually, yeah, the food's all on the kitchen counter; could you bring them over to the dining room, please?" said Hilde.

"No problem." Une went into the kitchen. "Hey, is the pumpkin pie supposed to look like this?"

Puzzled, Hilde went into the kitchen and saw what Une was talking about. A third of the pumpkin pie was gone, with what looked like child-size finger indentations in the rest of it, and there were crumbs all over the table. Hilde immediately figured out who had done it.

"JASON!!!"

~*~


	3. Mayhem at the Kids' Table

Disclaimer: Don't own Gundam Wing. The kiddies are mine, though…

Thanksgiving at the Maxwells Part 3

by Dorothy Winner

~*~

A problem soon arose regarding one of the foods at the table…

Wufei and Dorothy were arguing over who should be the one to cut the turkey. "_I_ should cut the turkey," said Dorothy. "I'm very good at _slicing_ things."

"Slicing food, or slicing people? Everyone knows you will just stab the turkey with the knife, onna," Wufei snapped. "I don't think anyone wants a turkey shish-ke-bob for dinner."

"Oh really?" said Dorothy. "I don't suppose you would do any better, you'd probably just hack the turkey into pieces…"

"Excuse _me_," said Hilde, "_I _was the one who made the turkey; I should be the one to cut it, don't you think?"

Wufei and Dorothy stopped. "Of… of course," said Wufei.

"You're right, Hilde, um… go ahead," said Dorothy.

Hilde took the knife and began to slice. "Okay, who wants turkey?"

Meanwhile, Mariemaia was trying to get all fourteen children of the Gundam pilots to sit down. "Um… everybody," she half-shouted over the din, "please, just pick a seat and sit down; remember, the sooner you sit down, the sooner you can eat…"

This seemed to work; Jason Maxwell plopped into a seat in a flash, and the other children quickly sat down as well.

As Mariemaia was putting Isabella and Serena into booster seats, an argument rose at the far end of the table. Mariemaia sighed and went over to the other end. "All right, what's the problem?"

Morgiana was sitting between Matthew Barton and Jade Chang. All the seats were filled except for one at the opposite end of the table. "I want to sit next to Morgiana," said Helen, "but Jade's in the way."

"I was here first," said Jade adamantly.

"But I want to sit next to Morgiana," said Helen. "Can't you sit over there?" she said, pointing to an empty seat across the table.

"_You_ go sit over there," said Jade. "I'm _not_ moving."

"Okay, okay," said Mariemaia, "look, Matthew, is it okay if you go sit over there so Helen can sit with Morgiana?"

"Sure," said Matthew, getting up and sitting down in the other seat.

"All right. Helen, you can sit next to Morgiana, and Jade, you can keep your seat," said Mariemaia. "I'll be right back with some turkey. _Don't _start eating yet, okay?"

Mariemaia took the empty turkey platter and went over to where Hilde was cutting the turkey. "How are the kids, dear?" asked Hilde.

"They're… well, they're… really something," said Mariemaia. She held out the platter. "I don't know how many slices we'll be needing. Most of the kids won't be able to finish a whole slice of turkey, but Jason can scarf down two or three."

Hilde began to place turkey slices on the platter. "I knew he would be going after the desserts, so I made two more pumpkin pies and hid them just in case," said Hilde. "Here you go. Come back for more if you need some."

"Thanks," said Mariemaia. She took the platter and went back to the kids' table, setting it down. "I'm going to be coming around with the sparkling apple cider. Hold out your plastic champagne glasses if you want some."

"Fizzy stuff!" Christopher cried out eagerly, waving his plastic champagne glass in the air. Mariemaia couldn't help but smile. "There you go, Christopher… be careful not to spill it." 

After she filled everyone's glass, Mariemaia went to sit down. She heard a loud snort come from Jason. Mariemaia gave him a suspicious look and found the bowl of mashed potatoes on her seat. "Very funny, guys." She put the mashed potatoes back on the table and sat down. "Now, before we all eat," she said, "someone has to say the Thanksgiving prayer. Would any of you like to?"

"I do! I do!" Jason exclaimed eagerly.

"Um… okay," said Mariemaia. "You first fold your hands and bow your heads…"

All the children quickly followed her example. Jason closed his eyes and clasped his hands together, bowing his head reverently and looking like an angel child about to recite the most solemn prayer. There was a pause.

"Good food, good meat, good God, let's eat!" he exclaimed.

"Amen!" Christopher piped up, and soon everyone was piling food onto their plates.

 "No, _no_," said Mariemaia, "that's not a Thanksgiving prayer at _all_…" But it was too late; all the kids were stuffing their mouths with food. Mariemaia sighed. She could feel a headache coming on… "Never mind. Just remember, you touch it, you eat it, okay?"

Mariemaia had done some babysitting for some of the children of the Gundam pilots, but never all at once, and now she was finding the task a bit overwhelming. Between trying to keep order at the table and cleaning up after the kids, Mariemaia couldn't even get in the time to eat herself. "Christopher, don't chew with your mouth open… Here's your bottle, Serena… Mia, do you need me to help you slice that turkey into smaller pieces? Sure, honey… Jason, don't mix your cranberry sauce with your mashed potatoes, eeeeew, that's disgusting… You accidentally got gravy on your dress, Morgiana? Here, I'll wipe it off… Open wide, Isabella, the mashed potatoes are _really_ yummy…Your sweet potato fell onto the _floor_, Lucian? Get another one; I'll pick it up… Jonathan, you have some pasta sauce on your chin, let me wipe it off for you… You want some more fizzy juice, Genevieve? Hold out your glass… Don't reach across the table, Helen, ask someone to pass it to you…"

Jason was getting frustrated. Try as he might, he couldn't get that pretty Elena Peacecraft, with the shimmering blond hair and big, deep cerulean eyes that were unlike those of any other girl he had ever seen, to notice him. He had been trying to get her attention all during dinner and she hadn't even glanced at him yet. He, Jason Maxwell, who could get any girl in his kindergarten class to share their crayons with him, wasn't used to trying this hard in vain. 

The time had come for drastic action. He took a spoonful of peas and flung them at Elena, yelling, "_Peas_craft!"

Elena was abruptly jolted out of her pleasant conversation with Genevieve Winner and stood up, shaking the peas out of her hair, her eyes blazing with fury. She had obviously inherited her father's temper, and the full force of it was directed at Jason Maxwell. "You mean, horrible boy!" she cried. "How _dare_ you insult my family name!" She grabbed the bowl nearest to her and took aim at Jason.

"Elena, _NO!!!_" exclaimed Mariemaia.

SPLAT.

The bowl hit Jason dead-on. Jason found himself dripping with… gravy. The bowl shattered on the floor with an almighty crash.

A unified "ooooooh" came from the other children. Hilde ran into the room and gasped. "Oh my goodness… what happened here?"

"I… Jason… he… Elena…" began Mariemaia. "That's _it_! I've had enough! I'm _done_!" she cried, marching from the room.

"Jason threw his peas at Elena and called her a Peascraft, so she threw the bowl of gravy at him," Helen explained.

"Jason!" said Hilde angrily. "What an awful thing to do! Apologize at once."

"I'm sorry, Elena. I really am," Jason said earnestly.

No response.

"You too, Elena," said Hilde. "Although what Jason said was very mean, you shouldn't have overreacted."

"I'm sorry," said Elena, although she still glared at Jason.

"All right," said Hilde, "c'mon, Jason, we have to get you cleaned up."

Jason got out of his chair and started to leave. Lucian Peacecraft stopped him. "I won't let you hurt my sister," he said, with an eerie similarity to his father.

Jason swallowed and followed his mother out of the room.

~*~


	4. Almost an Accident

Disclaimer: Don't own Gundam Wing. The kiddies are mine, though…

Thanksgiving at the Maxwells

by Dorothy Winner

~*~

Jason was forced to forego dessert as punishment, which, to him, was devastating; dessert was pumpkin pie and German chocolate cake, his favorite.

He sat miserably in his room while the others were finishing dessert. He was clean again, dressed in a little black priests' outfit much like his dad's; his only suit, having been covered in gravy, being in the wash. He looked very unhappy; whether this was due more to the loss of dessert or the fact that Elena Peacecraft now hated him, he didn't know.

Jonathan walked into the room and sat down next to Jason. "Maxwell no baka. Throwing food at a girl is not a good way to make friends with her."

"I just wanted her to talk to me," Jason said dejectedly. "Now she'll never talk to me again."

"Yeah, well…" Jonathan held out a small piece of cake to Jason. "Here… I know you're not supposed to have any, but I snuck some out anyway. It's a little smooshed, but you can still eat it."

Jason brightened. "Seriously? Thanks, Jonathan, you're the best!" he exclaimed, eagerly cramming the cake into his mouth. "Hey… d'you wanna play my 'Endless Duel' video game? You can be Wing Zero, and I'll be Deathscythe…"

Back at the kids' table, Genevieve was trying to persuade Elena to forgive Jason. "Really, Elena, you mustn't take Jason so seriously. He makes fun of all of the girls; he's called me 'Forky' lots of times."

But Elena had her father's tenacity for holding grudges as well. "He has insulted my family and my pride. He doesn't deserve my forgiveness."

"Don't you think you're being a little—oh, never mind," said Genevieve, taking another bite of her cake, knowing it was useless to try and convince her otherwise.

Meanwhile, at the other end of the table, the kids were asking each other if they had any special talents.

"Do you really know how to walk a tightrope?" Morgiana asked Matthew.

"Sure, my dad taught me how," said Matthew. "It's not that hard."

"Wow," said Helen, impressed.

"I heard it takes years and years of practice," said Jade from across the table. "I think he's lying."

"I'm _not_," said Matthew. "I have really good balance. My dad said so."

"Well then, if it's so easy for you, I dare you to walk on the railing upstairs," said Jade.

Matthew bit his lip for a second and then said, "Okay."

The four of them ran upstairs. Matthew appraised the railing carefully. Oak, sturdy, wider than a regular tightrope, actually; shouldn't be too bad, Matthew thought. He mounted the railing and got up on his feet, holding his arms out for balance. He slowly began to walk forward, placing one foot in front of the other.

But as good as Matthew's balance was, he was still a beginner, and halfway across the railing his left foot slipped. He began to teeter toward the side that was open to the living room floor twenty feet below. Helen and Jade just stood there, frozen in horror. Morgiana went white to the very tips of her hair and dashed down the stairs to the dining room. She came back out, pulling Trowa's arm, followed by Midii.

Trowa looked up to see his son fall off of the second floor railing. Midii screamed as Trowa yelled, "Matthew!" and launched into the air with his signature triple flip, catching his son in midair and landing on the second floor.

"What did you think you were doing? Why did you do that?" Trowa said over and over, holding on tightly to his son.

"I'm sorry," Matthew mumbled into his dad's shirt.

Midii ran up the stairs and hugged Matthew, tears running down her face. "How could you have attempted something this high up? You could have died! Oh, I'm so glad you're safe…" she said, clinging to him ever tighter.

"Mom… get off…"

Midii let go and turned to Trowa, her eyes blazing with fury. "This is all your fault!"

"_Me_?"

"Yes, _you_! I told you not to teach him tightrope walking, I toldyou it was too dangerous, but did you listen? No!" cried Midii, her voice getting louder and louder. "I told you he was too young, but you went ahead and taught him anyway! I knew something like this would happen! He's just like _you_! You're both so stubborn and _reckless_!!!"

While Trowa and Midii were arguing, Matthew walked back over to where Helen, Jade, and Morgiana were standing.

"I'm really sorry," said Jade. "I shouldn't have dared you."

"I'm glad you're not dead," said Helen.

Morgiana nervously looked at Matthew. "I'm sorry I got you into trouble."

Matthew went up to Morgiana and took one of her hands in his. "No. Thank you for saving my life."

~*~

TBC…


	5. Mission Complete

Author's Note: And here's the next crazy installment of Thanksgiving at the Maxwells… after this, just one more part, folks, and then it's on to Heero's Torture Shopping the Day After… ^_~

Disclaimer: Don't own Gundam Wing. The kiddies are mine, though…

Thanksgiving at the Maxwells

by Dorothy Winner

~*~

"Give up, Yuy."

"You wish."

Milliardo and Heero were locked in an arm wrestling match at one end of the dining table, their grips so firm that their knuckles were turning white.

Relena, Noin, and Sally emerged from the kitchen, each with a large slice of German chocolate cake.

"They're still at it, huh?" said Sally.

"It never stopped," said Relena.

"It never will," said Noin.

"I've resigned myself to the fact that they'll never get used to being brothers-in-law," said Relena.

Prussian blue eyes locked with ice blue ones.

"You know I won't back down," said Milliardo.

"And you know I won't," said Heero.

"Don't they have anything better to do?" asked Sally.

"No," said Relena and Noin together.

"I thought so…"

"We'd better go," said Noin, "this is going to be a while…"

~*~

Duo sprawled out on the couch and loosened his belt. "I think I ate too much."

Hilde sat down next to him and poked him in the stomach. "Correction: you did eat too much."

"You always eat too much," said Wufei, sitting down in an armchair next to the couch.

"Well, Hilde's such a great cook, I just can't resist."

"That's because you're a glutton, Maxwell," said Wufei. "Keep on eating this way and you'll end up fat when you're older."

"Hey Hilde," said Duo, what would you think if I had a gut?"

Hilde shook her head. "Ugh, that's too scary to even think about."

"You'd still think I'm sexy, wouldn't you?"

Wufei scoffed. "I would never let my body deteriorate into such a condition. And as for you, Maxwell, your self-proclaimed sex appeal is highly overrated."

"Hey!" Duo exclaimed and Hilde laughed.

~*~

"Target sighted."

Jason Maxwell crawled on his stomach along the second floor railing, peering down at his parents and Wufei with his mini-binoculars.

His binoculars were focused on Wufei.

"Loading ammo," whispered Jason, as he took an egg he had stolen from the refrigerator and put it in the cradle of his slingshot. "Acquiring target," he said, scooting closer to the railing. "I have a clear shot. Still clear?"

Jonathan looked at the unsuspecting Wufei from his hiding place behind a large potted plant. "All clear. Proceed with the mission," he whispered into his walkie-talkie.

"Roger," said Jason, squinting as he aimed his slingshot at Wufei…

Wufei was lecturing Duo on the perils of being overweight when he suddenly felt something hit him on the top of his head with a crunching noise. 

"What was that?" Wufei shouted, bolting up from the couch and crouching into a fighter's stance. He felt something cold and slimy slide down the side of his face. He put his hand to it and brought it away, looking at the slimy yellow mess in his hand. "An _egg_?!" 

Wufei looked up and saw Jason scamper. "MAXWELL!!!" he yelled, going up the stairs three at a time.

"Proceed with Stage Two!" Jason shouted into his walkie-talkie as he ran from Wufei. "Maxwell out!"

'Must complete the mission,' Jonathan thought. He stealthily crept along the wall with a bucket of water balloons and peered into the dining room. 'Target sighted.'

Heero sensed movement and shifted his gaze the tiniest fraction, spotting his son take a large pink water balloon out of the bucket. He fought to keep his face impassive as Jonathan aimed it at Milliardo…

"Ready to surrender, Yuy?" asked Milliardo.

"On the contrary, you are going to be in for a very nasty surprise," said Heero.

"_What_?"

SPLASH.

The pink balloon connected with the back of Milliardo's head, completely dousing him with cold water. "What the hell?!" He turned around to find out who the culprit was as Heero slammed his hand into the table.

"OOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Jonathan made a run for it as Milliardo bolted after him, cradling his hand. "_YUY_!!!"

Jason ran down the stairs with Wufei at his heels as Jonathan led Milliardo into the dining room. Jason narrowly dodged a table as he ran straight at Jonathan. At the last second, the two boys swerved around each other and ducked under the legs of Wufei and Milliardo.

So perhaps it was because they were too enraged to see clearly, or because egg yolk or dripping hair were obscuring their vision, or maybe simply because there just wasn't enough time to stop, that Milliardo and Wufei collided, their heads hitting together with a sickening crack. The two bounced off of each other like rag dolls and fell to the floor, completely stunned.

Jason ran forward with his sister's purple Polaroid camera and snapped a picture. He and Jonathan triumphantly slapped high fives over their unconscious uncles.

"Mission complete!"

~*~

"Oh, my aching head…" moaned Milliardo as Relena applied some ice to the nasty bump that was starting to form on his head (Noin having had to go into another room to try and calm down from fits of hysterical laughter).

"Onna! Stop fawning over me!" Wufei snapped as Sally tried to apply an ice pack to his bump, only to have Wufei dodge it.

"Keep _still_, Wufei!" said Sally. "I have to stop the swelling!"

The two culprits were sitting on a pair of chairs in the kitchen before Duo and Heero.

"First of all, I've gotta say, that was brilliant. I've never seen anything like it. Pure genius," said Duo. "Do we really hafta punish them?"

"_Yes_!" said Hilde and Relena.

"Kids, that was a terrible thing to do," Duo said sternly. "Very terrible…"

"You saw him, didn't you, Yuy?" said Milliardo angrily. "Why didn't you stop him?"

Heero just shrugged, his face expressionless.

"Don't give me that, Yuy! Answer me! Owwww!" Milliardo groaned as pain shot through his head.

"Try not to talk too loud, Milliardo, I'm afraid you've got a slight concussion," said Sally. "My husband here, on the other hand, has a very thick skull… or maybe just a very thick head…" she added as Wufei ducked away from her ice pack.

"Onna! Get that thing away from me!"

"That boy inherited nothing from you, did he?" Milliardo snapped, turning on Relena as she tried to put more ice on his bump. "There's not a single drop of Peacecraft blood in that boy!"

"Milliardo, _please_! I'm trying to help!" cried Relena.

"You put your son up to this, didn't you, Maxwell?" Wufei shouted as he dodged Sally's ice pack for the umpteenth time.

"What? No! I didn't know anything about this!" said Duo. "That was a very bad thing to do, boys, very bad!" he scolded.

"Heero!" said Relena. "Don't you have anything to say about this? My brother now has a concussion because of what Jonathan did!"

"Yeah," Heero said in his monotone, slowly moving toward his son. Jonathan swallowed fearfully as he looked up at his dad. Heero reached out… 

…and fondly ruffled Jonathan's unruly brown hair. 

"That's my boy."

~*~

TBC…


End file.
